If Looks Could Kill Part 2

I'm finding that the outside world views me as that woman. You know the one. The one with the unruly children. The one who's children are bouncing off the wall, running around the store and the woman who's children are screaming in the middle of the restaurant and flailing around on the floor.

In my defense ... my kids are not like that. Honestly! We've always been able to take them into a restaurant and have a nice meal. Yes we have moments where we have to take them out of the restaurant until they can maintain some sort of composure. But all in all I have very well behaved, sensitive, well mannered two year olds. {Now if that ain't an oxymoron I don't know what is} Look, they're two! And there are two of them! So anytime people see us coming...they cringe. And to be quite honest ... It's starting to piss me off!

{I say that as kindly as I can}

Recently I started Weight Watchers {again}. I decided I would go to the Monday morning meeting and start my week off right. The first week the kids stayed with their Aunt and I went by myself. The second week I took them with me. I went in, weighed in, and thought "Oh, there is hardly anyone here. I'll stay for the meeting.". As the meeting began I sat there {in the very back corner} thinking I had this all wrapped up! After all, I'd brought Cheerios, milk and toys. Surely they would sit there and eat quietly. They did eat. What they didn't spill on the floor. And drink. And climb on the unoccupied chairs. And brought me every empty box found on the display shelf. And asked me what that was hanging on the wall like a million times at the top of their lungs.

{We haven't quite mastered the inside/outside voice thing yet}.

And then it happened. The woman at the front desk, you now the one....the one that takes your money. Yeah, her. Here she comes walking up to me in the middle of the meeting. IN FRONT OF EVERYONE! I can see she's holding something in her hand. She doesn't even bother taking the empty seat next to me. She stands directly in front of me and using her best "Now Dear" voice she proceeds to inform me that on Fridays....wait for it.....there is a Mommy and Me meeting that they would love for me to attend.......wait for it......{there's more}.....and that during that meeting they don't care what the kids are doing.

I WAS FRICKING HUMILIATED!

And pissed off!

Does this woman work at Target? Is she married to that old coot who shot me the dirty look. Come on people! I just looked at her, took the paper, picked up the Cheerios off the floor, put the display back together, gathered my diaper bag, my keys ~ where the hell are my keys? And slowly walked out of the room in the middle of the meeting.

And do you know....the meeting leader didn't say a word!

I can only imagine what they all said after I left.